Umbre si forme

"Intunericul albi pana-n strafunduri.

Pe el il uitase si amintirea, se impaienjenea de cate ori incerca s-o recheme. Numai degetul parea ca pastreaza atingerea pielii lui.

In adancul ei plutea peisajul de seara.

Oglinda si nalucile din ea se miscau una-ntra-alta ca intr-un film. Persoanele n-aveau legatura cu decorul. Purtau in ele o transparenta fugara, intr-un peisaj care era doar o intunecare incetosata de seara. Ambele, topite si amestecate, schitau o lume parelnica de umbre.

Imaginea lui opaca intrerupea peisajul, dar inconjurata cum era de umbre fugare, imprumuta o transparenra ireala.

Am avut iluzia ca se perinda campia prin trasaturile fetei, dar din toata aceasta curgere neintrerupta, nu putea retine nici un contur deslusit.

Aparu trecatoare, fara sa straluceasca in chipul lui, o luminita departata si rece. Cu palpairea ei aprinsa in pupila, ochiul plutitor pe valurile inserarii luci o clipa, ca un licurici fermecator si bizar."

BEM

Fascination for the moon

Hello.
I’m 37. Since I was a child, I always felt strong emotions when I looked at the moon above.
I was strongly amazed by its form, it’s light.
The moon has always been there for me

Hello again. Since a couple days ago, I’m 37.
And I’m alone.
So many wrong choices I took but guess what? I never feared to be a loser, I took every single chance, I fought every single threat, I never said NO. My life brought me here where I am today.
I always looked above. Specially when ugly people told me “U will never make it”.
I find such a misterious energy fuel to dare me, under the word “impossible"

I lost so many battles. I made so many mistakes. But I’m here, still fighting, still making mistakes… still willing to learn from them.

And the moon was every single night the reflection of my tears.
They say it’s made of cheese. I like to say it’s made of hope.

I said YES. Every single time. Personal policy.
YES is a very strong word. YES is the way life gives u the opportunity to show that u grow, and that u finally got the chance to probe you can be better….

I felt fear. I so damn much love fear. That fear you feel when standing in front of an audience or in front of a TV camera on a live interview.
FEAR MAKES ME LIVE
I learned that RESPECT not only means to have all the bones in our body safe.
I learned that RESPECT is the beginning and ending on human relationships.

I only surround by people who is not MEDIOCRE. Mediocrity is contagious.

…. And the moon was there for me… every single night of my life…. Watching me grow from the distance…

Also she was there for me that night when I met the love of my life.I asked the moon: Should I? Of course she didn’t answer. She knows I am a YES person.

I met God. In so many ways. In the eyes of my street dogs. In the values I live by.

In the deadly love I feel for you….
So many hours having strong discussions about God during teenage and college...

And I came to the conclussion: God is LOVE, God is YES, God is RESPECT

But show me. Show me that way i dont know.
…And let me show u those ways u hadn’t went through yet….

I give people only one chance to proof their loyalty.
And I give only one chance because I’m convinced that everybody lies.

I WILL retire at 45. Young enough to take charge of the family while you keep developing your professional life.

I like to live comfortabily. I know you hate big things. But It’s my own way to probe myself I can still do better.

…. And dogs…. I’ve witnessed how divine creatures they are…

My definition of LOVE: warmth and hope

Hello. I’m 37.And I’m not getting any younger.

And the moon wants me to do better. She knows i hadn’t reached my potential yet....

I won’t EVER accept that my destiny is not in my hands.

But I really want and need to believe I am part of something greater than me.
You call it GOD; I call it JESUS.
You call it LOVE; I call it IRINA GABRIELA NITA.

Mi goal is to DIE in the arms of the woman I love. And to leave behind the most beautiful family in the whole world.

I feel alone. I feel hopeless. I feel a bleeding heart. But I’m betting EVERYTHING for a brighter future that I know will arise some day.
That future for me, has a name, and has funny frog eyes. And makes love to me like no one ever did or will do.

…. I want you to be my moon ….

God Bless you, my Woman.

PS: And this is what i call simplicity and love!

ironia dialogului

-Dupa ce abordezi in felul tau, apoi o iei la goana. Imbratisezi penibilul si cand realizezi, esti dur atat cu tine cat si cu ceilalti. Ti-e teama sa nu fi respins, sa nu pierzi..

Ma grabesc sa te intreb -Si daca pierzi ce? Si daca esti respins ce?

Nu ti-am lasat niciodata impresia ca si eu te voi respinge asa cum multi altii au facut-o, dar totusi fugi.

Let me give u a tip, ok? Learn how to behave!

- Dar nu vreau sa ma port frumos cu tine, nu meriti si chiar daca meriti, asta's eu, nu-mi pasa de nimeni.

-Uofff, voiam sa pariez ca pentru a nu stiu cata oara vei aborda aceasta fateta a ta pentru a iesi din penibil, crezi tu. Totul este quid pro quo maestre. Daca din partea mea primesti ceea ce nu te-ai fi asteptat sa mai gasesti, de ce nu tatonezi generozitatea si tu!?!

-.....

- Esti nesigur,nu iti esti suficient tie insuti si cauti sa te implinesti prin ceilalti. Cauti acceptarea, venerarea.

Si cate pierzi...nu esti sincer nici cu tine, nici cu ei, ei nu ofera, sunt dibaci, tu nu oferi si esti precaut...cata superficialitate si relatii de suprafata...doar ca timpul sa curga...

Ai doar momente cand esti sincer si cu tine si cu ei...cateva secunde glorioase ai...si te rusinezi si de ele, impachetandu-le cu cele mai urate ambalaje existente prin dulap, ca sa nu starnesti curiozitate. Esti un pui sarman si zgribulit si te ascunzi ca un catelus in spatele fotoliului de plus din sufrageria veche si prafuita a bunicii, ce-si pune labele pe ochi si nu vrea sa mai priveasca ce este in jur.

Viata nu este asa cum ai citit si cum ai perceput-o tu in carti...informatiile pe care le-ai acumulat sunt importante- cine are informatia are si puterea, imi zicea un cunoscut cu ceva timp in urma- dar ele nu-ti creioneaza viitorul, ele te ajuta doar sa faci predictii, poate mai rapid decat altii, dar in viata nu umbli cu un indrumator in buzunar, iar la fiecare actiune il scoti si incerci sa te dumiresti de aici cum vei actiona.

:)))) pari un pustan debusolat, descult, cu parul ravasit, in ploaie, in mijlocul strazii, scarpinandu-se in cap, citindui-se pe fata nesiguranta...ce imagine adorabila!

Invata si accepta- trebuie sa treci prin toate, de la umilinta la glorie, de la esec la succes, de la respingere la acceptare pentru ca mai apoi sa poti sa traiesti complet.

Tatoneaza orice pamant fie el si fertil...asa nu risti sa fi devenit un geniu neinteles, iubit numai de cativa si aceia o fac neconditionat si nu pentru grozavia de care vrei sa dai dovada , ci pentru ca te inteleg fara sa si rostesti macar...

- Stii ca nu's asa cu toata lumea, numai ca nu vreau sa-mi pierd timpul cu...

- Sssttt...daca erai nitel mai degajat, mai nesimtit, mai empatic si impacat cu tine, lasa-i la o parte egocentrismul asta tesut si mi-ai fi raspuns:- "Ego-ul tau a ajuns la cer acum, nu?"

In schimb tu nu-mi arati decat imensa ta nevoie de dragoste...